I'm girl who used to be bubbly ,cheerful .. and so jubilant...  ..

 

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one day,I decided to study overseas despite all of my sis's warning...  not telling anyone,I went there .. 

 

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my life started to change

 

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 clearly,I remembered.

at the airport.. my excitment and expectation reached their peak states as I arrived the destination.

 "oh.. it's gna be so fun to be here" i thought.

 

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if u think this story is gonna be like a happy student enjoying her life there.. full stop.. i shall ask u to click X at ur top right corner now..

 

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I now regret to study oversea.. .. why!? u may ask..  Ironically,I don't even know why .

Feeling shld be the best answer for this question..

feeling alone?? mayb yes mayb no ... throng of ppl r around me everyday ,yet it felt as though I was all alone carrying this world on my shoulders..

 

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I duno what's going on with my life .. the only thing I know is to live or "survive" everyday god gives me

 

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I'd been doing it all wrong since i was young..  hd been pondering if i could hv a better life .. not realising that I WAS ALREADY HAVING THE GREATEST THING IN MY LIFE .. 

 

I've been tking unimportant ( for me ) subject .. i can't do a single thing now and that's the worst i can say..

 

I've been saddening a person who is so so so damn important to me .. I swear that I'd be greatly immersely extremely certainly absolutely distressful if the person does the same thing i did (several times) to him!

 

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my sense of feeling loses.. numbing would be good word to decribe.. unnerving and disturbing situation i'm facing.

almost evey second tickles by, I could still feel the sheer agony.. I'm really praying  it'd soon (very very soon) fade away.. and never ever come bck!!

I realised that i've losed some of my self-reliance , self-confidence and believe.. I'm soon becoming a new person i've never ever wanted to be..

I felt as though every time i speak, it was in an unsure manner,tentatively..

i cn't get why I hv to put a million train of senseless thoughts in my mind. I hate doing this.. 

 

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I wish I could reel myself back to time when I was 12 years old.. I wish I could steal few more years back to stay with my parents and sisters, to dislike going overseas, to heed my sis's advise..

 

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the end ..   be cheerful, BUAY plz dun overthink!  I reitiateeeeeeeeeeeee.......